There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
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