I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
He locked about 20 beers in a suitcase and put it in the fridge. For a complete idiot, he's a goddamn genius.
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so my daughter wakes me up this morning and i feel like a vibration so im thinking she has my phone..nope my vibrator
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
So this morning when I woke up. I found my refrigerator open and no more food. It was empty, I'm home alone for the week. Where in hell did that food go?
Randomize