He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
I'm at breakfast at my kid's school and I have noted at least 3 other parents with last night's red wine mouth and bleary eyes. I don't know why I always get so paranoid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
Randomize