But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
There is a strange man mowing my lawn. Best day ever.
you poured 3 beers into an empty vase and then passed out, so i drank them for you. don't say i'm not a good friend.
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
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i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
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