you were definitelymotorboating random chicks as they walked out of the bar. just like, down the line. you kept yelling "Motor Boats for everyone!!!!"
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
Randomize
