I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
Randomize
