Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
Princesses don't give blow jobs
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
THE MIME IS MIMING TO BUST A MOVE KARAOKE. ALL MIME-RELATED EVENTS DESERVE CAPS LOCK
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
Randomize