just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
23 Bisexuals Confess The Biggest Differences Between Dating People Of Each Sex
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
These 25 Ruthless Teachers Embarrassed Their Students
anyone who texts me today gets a complimentary picture of my mangled foot. starting with you.
ewwwww wtf when you left last night you were fine?
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"