remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
Update on my sex life: my calves are sore from masturbating too much. It's a thing. Look it up.
Randomize
