similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
Randomize
