No, I can't hang out with Dave because he already has a girlfriend. The one with the tatoos of cherries on her "cherry." Yeah, she doesn't really make me feel spectacularly comfortable.
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
he said I was the best sex he's ever had, handed me a burger king crown and told me to take my walk of shame with pride
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
not sure when or how we ended up at this wedding party but you need to be here they are handing out screwdrivers and Yamakas to everyone and it's a got damn open bar you need to be here now
Lo siento on account of my penis...
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
Randomize
