He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
Last night, I accomplished the impossible. I pissed while riding my bicycle home without pissing all over myself. My Dutch friends gave me a round of applause and said I was now the king of holland.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
You were so drunk, you called my cruise control, the "auto pilot" and asked my car politely to take us to Taco Bell.
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize
