i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
i just masturbated with purell and my dick burns and smells like a hospital
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
Let's get the cat blown out
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
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