first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
This beer is not sobering me up at all
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
I RAN OVER A NUN! I RAN OVER A FUCKING NUN! GOD WILL NEVER FORGIVE ME FOR MY SINS NOW!!!
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
He showed up soaking wet with a flashlight and a ping pong ball. I couldn't say no
Well we've always known you have a weakness for guys with balls in their hands
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
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