i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
who knew "i drink your milkshake" would work as a pickup line
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
Watching the awkward tinder date at the table next to mine is the most action I've had in months, so there's that.
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
Randomize
