Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
I'm drunk enough to talk Barbara Walters outta her panties
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
So I woke up this morning to find my laptop open, with a google search for "where to buy marble", and a hungover naked northern girl in my bed who told me that I claimed to be a sculptor last night and that I promised to sculpt a bust of her hands...
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize