It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
Date with Air Force guy was nice btw. And for my next trick I'll talk him into fucking me in his fighter jet at 30,000 ft.
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
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