there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
He booked his flight from Dallas already, no ticket to the game, said hes gonna bang some girl at tailgait to get a ticket, I had to explain that it will be sub 20 degrees F during tailgate, he decided to come in july instead, Texans are dumb.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
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