Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
What can I say, I bounce back quick. Never thought the line "my turtle died" would get me so many free drinks last night
She walked home carrying a six pack of beer and someone elses cat
SHE BETTER HAVE BROUGHT BACK MY FUCKING COUCH CUSIONS OR SHES GUNNA GET IT.
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
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