did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
My Hamptons summer hookup resume reads like a walk-in clinic waiting list.
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
When a guy wants to eat something off you and then comes back with microwaved strudel and custard, back the fuck out. I have apple-chunk burns on my tits.
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
I wore my Gollum shirt. It struck up a conversation AND got him staring at my boobs. That's a win-win.
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
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