So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
Hey, um, after thinking about it, I decided I really don't want to use applying olive oil to your ass for your fissure as part of foreplay because... well... really? Just read that again.
Randomize
