Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
They were arguing about who would hit the piñata first so naturally you tore it open with your hands. You broke the piñata and their hearts.
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
Randomize
