my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
Neighbor who got arrested at 3am just said he'd split the $ with me if I testify as the witness in his police brutality trial. He was also holding a baby and a case of beer.
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
Did I tell you I’m going on a date? His name is Michael and we both like dinosaurs and anal.
Randomize
