I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
Randomize
