You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments.
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
Consider yourself lucky. If I ever run into my ex, all I'll be able to think is, "I let you pee on me and lead me around on a leash."
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
Randomize
