he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
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