Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
How drunk do you think I'll be by the time I get home?
I just watched you drink a whole glass of wine through a Twizzler. Pretty drunk.
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO BE A DRUNK WHEN ALL MY ENABLERS ARE BUSY?!
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
Randomize
