I wish you were here to vomit in your hand.
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
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