i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
I think I am morally bankrupt
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
Drinking heavily at 3pm and about to rescue a 30lb street turtle. Dont even bother attempting to rise to this level bitch
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
Here's the "to do" list i just found on my phone: buy stripper pole, make sex playlist, buy febreeze
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
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