Please, let me fuck your mom
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
you had me at cake vodka
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
Randomize
