Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
Tonight's Jeopardy categories were "Star Trek, Action Figures, Dinner For One, In Need of a Date, Still Living With Mom & Dad, You Have No Life." Beginning to think my life is the Truman Show.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
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