I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
Randomize