In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
Pretty sure the purpose of joining wine clubs isn't to drink the 2 bottles they send you each month IN THE SAME NIGHT.
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Randomize
