A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
I just found a dead bug in my nose. if that's the worst thing up there im considdering myself lucky.
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
Why do I always give away anal sex as birthday presents?
Shut up... one mans birthday cake is another mans sodomy my friend
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
It's like trying to pry an octopus off you. Except the octopus speaks English and can get drunk.
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
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