i don't plan on having that self control this summer
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
I feel like every car around me knows I'm driving in my snuggie
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
Thanks to a poorly written tweet a whole bunch of people thought I died last night.
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
Randomize
