i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
After last night, I could never be a politician.
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
Bailing my boss from jail at five in the morning.. If thats not a promotion I don't what is.
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
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