nut hugger
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
The only thing worse than being arrested is the fact the cop confiscated my green dinosaur costume.
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
Randomize
