Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
You called me and said "Aidan's unconscious" to which he said "I'm conscious, I'm conscious pilot"
He was filled with the holy spirit. And vodka.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
Sad realization: so long as I use this sleep apnea machine, I will never be the little spoon!
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
He's on the porch naked. Help.
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
Randomize
