he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
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the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
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He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
Never again will I go to my mom's side of the family's parties. After the bride and groom cut the head off the roasted pig together they boarded their RV and rode off into the sunset.
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
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