is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
Randomize