That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
Randomize
