She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
Randomize
