i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
birth control should be required to get into college
the night ended with taco bell and tears
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
In the words of Disney’s Jafar, “desperate times call for desperate measures.”
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