are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
I woke up with a random mailbox in my room with a note that said "this should probably be returned. Happy Thursday!"
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
Found my wallet. It was under my dresser with a note that said "good job you found me". Drunk me is an ass.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
Have a booty call at 3am, stopped for tacos at 2:30. It's 2:55 and I still haven't ordered but can't jump the curb to get out of line because there is a cop in front of me. What am I doing with my life?
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
Randomize
