I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
Randomize
