his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
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