Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
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