So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
The couple that wants to take me home just paid the bartender $100 to pour tequila down my throat. I think I'm in some type of twilight zone where stds run rampant and the alcohol floweth
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
I was stalking his twitter and saw that he used punctuation in a hashtag. Thank god we didn't work out because I can't be with someone that incompetent
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
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