can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
Bonded with the ladies at the perfume outlet by saying "help me smell like i'm not hungover before my shift starts". This is not where I wanted my life to be
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
I was gonna be Romantic and write your name in emoji eggplants but A's are hard
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS
Randomize
