What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
plans for tonight: dress up like pirates, drink a bottle of mad dog and watch the sorostitues across the street get naked. and yes, the mad dog part is already in play. hurry the fuck up. i look like a loser doing this alone.
hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
Randomize
