they need to just BURY HIM!
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
i put that paper plate back in your cabinet because i ate all the ketchup off and you can't even tell. you're welcome.
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
Are you alive?
I googled "I don't want to vomit anymore," and "how to rip out your uvula," at 9 am this morning, but I'm still here. Uvula and all.
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
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